May I?
by Morbid1Curiosity
Summary: We understand a lot of things differently if only based on our own personal context. Sometimes we need something or someone to remind us to try and look at something in a more objective light.


**Author's note: Just a simple story to test out a new keyboard I had. Or get used to it or however, you want to call it.**

„Ruby! Not again." Weiss hit the bed with her fist in frustration, the same bed she was currently half laying on top of.

"I thought I had it this time!" Came the usual line of defense from the younger redhead. It wasn't hard to guess that this wasn't the first time.

"You've done the same thing for dozens of time by far." The Schnee girl had just enough self-control to close her laptop without smashing it, turning it off normally would have to wait for later. She rolled onto her side, away from the other girl, and placed the laptop on the ground, staying in that position afterward.

"I guess you don't want to try again?" Ruby spun on her chair to face the older girl. Not getting any response she frowned. "Weiss?" She asked again. "Weiss!" As there still was no response she got up from her chair. "Hey, come on! You know I hate it when you do this." She climbed the bed and nudged her. "Are you really angry with me? I didn't know this game meant so much to you."

While Weiss wasn't really angry at Ruby, there was some frustration over the time spent on that one level. After a while the brash behavior of her friend became tiring and it only wasted their time. Still, the frustration was short-lived yet she wanted to punish the girl in some way. Worrying her a little was enough to make her act more cautious next time. Hopefully

She rolled onto her back and glanced at Ruby's worried face. "It's fine, I just had some things on my mind lately. I'm not really mad at you." She closed her eyes at that.

"Aw, and I dragged you here to play that game with me. If I knew I wouldn't bother you." The redhead let out a defeated sigh.

"While often frustrating, playing with you helps me put my problems aside, if only for the time being." Truth being anything done with Ruby was pleasant. Well, most things. A wide variety of things done with Ruby was pleasant enough to justify the negatives. There, a proper way to explain fully how she felt towards the other girl and their time together.

"Really?" Even without opening her eyes, Weiss could imagine Ruby's face turning from a frown into a bright smile as if someone flipped a switch.

"Yes, can we just relax for a moment or two?" The frustration from before was long gone, but it felt so nice to just lay on Ruby's bed that she didn't want to move. At least not for now.

"Sure?" It wasn't the first time they did this, just laying on the bed next to each other. It was her idea and while Ruby was confused each time, she never opposed that. At first, she always attached an argument to it, to slow down, relax and all that, but since the redhead never really said anything outside of agreeing, she stopped saying anything. Simply proposing it was enough.

Only once she felt the girl lay next to her, did Weiss dared to open her eyes, glancing at the white ceiling she was so familiar with. She grew accustomed to this sight, as she more often started to not only visit Ruby but have sleepovers at her place. It was hard to decide for her if this was due to her wanting to escape her own house or was it simply because she wanted to visit the girl and spend time with her. While it was selfish to think that she simply used the girl, she hated her house. It was just so big yet so empty. Of course not in a material sense, oh no. There were plenty of things in her house, yet it was… Empty. Her older sister no longer lived there, she barely saw her mother and father and her younger brother often felt like he was trying to fight her for some weird position within the family as if there was some scoring system involved. Maybe there was? She didn't care.

But she did, didn't she? It's why she had her grades the way they were, it's why she learned to play instruments, to sing, to be a perfect example of a daughter, student, whatever it is her father required of her. Maybe deep down that's what she tried to escape. The invisible strings her father pulled. Here she was just… Just herself. She smiled to herself, yes, the perfect answer. She ran away from her father and into Ruby's embrace.

"Ruby?" Was she asleep? How much time has passed since those thoughts started to occupy her mind?

"Yes?" But that wasn't the case, as the redhead answered in a soft voice.

"May I hold your hand?" She wasn't sure why she asked or why she even wanted to do that right now. Was it because of what was currently on her mind?

"Sure." As the redhead answered, Weiss, moved her hand and placed it on top of Ruby's, who already had hers open and waiting. As soon as she placed her hand on top of that of the other girl, she closed her fingers, entangling them with Ruby's, the younger girl doing the same. Weiss took a deep breath at that, releasing it slowly as she felt a little bit more at peace. "You know you don't have to ask, right? I mean we already held hands a few times."

"I know. I just felt like asking this time." It just felt different this time. Sure, they held hands just like Ruby commented. But that was whenever they were going to school or from school. She wasn't sure why it just happened one day and occurred from time to time after that. Neither of them commented on it. As for her? She just liked it and didn't want to ruin it for either of them by saying something weird. She wasn't sure about Ruby and as with anything regarding the girl, she felt guilty of feeling as if she did things due to her anxiety. Whenever that happened she felt like her father, as if Ruby did things because she feared some invisible punishment that would occur if she did something against her wishes. If anything? It made Weiss feel sick in the stomach at such a possibility.

"Weiss? Are you alright? You're squeezing my hand for a while now." At Ruby's words, Weiss relaxed her grasp on the other girl's hand. She didn't even notice and felt a bit silly.

"Ruby? Do you… What do you think that love is?" It was pretty clear that Ruby didn't expect such response to her question.

"Eh? W-What brought that up?" Instead of addressing Ruby's confusion, Weiss simply continued with her train of thoughts.

"I recently heard something and it made me think, you know? About love." She started, a prelude to opening her mind before the girl, her worries that occupied her mind for the past few days. Moment to gather her thoughts as she wanted to make sure Ruby understood. "That love is just a path to misery. No, not to misery, it's a path of lies and delusions, a path that once two people enter it together, they start to get chased by this snowball. It's the snowball that's the misery and as they get further down this path, the snowball just gets bigger and bigger. As long as they don't look back, as long as they dwell within those lies, they're happy. It's only when they look back at the reality, are they hit with the realization of all the misery surrounding them." She felt the other girl sit up a bit, although that didn't break the physical connection they had with their hands.

"Weiss? Are you crying?" At Ruby's words, the Schnee girl opened her eyes in shock, not even checking if it was true, she quickly sat on the edge of the bed and away from the other girl. She reached up to see. Indeed, her cheeks were wet and then she felt it. Her eyes feeling warm and moist with tears. How did she not notice it sooner? "Is everything alright?" The answer to that question was simple. Nothing was alright.

"I heard that and thought how ludicrous that is. Love is supposed to be this strong… Thing. Emotion, feeling, whatever it is, it's supposed to be good. Pure, strong and selfless. Isn't it what everyone says whenever they talk about love?" She paused. "And yet when I heard it, it was as if someone implanted a seed inside my mind. It slowly started to make sense, you know? The idea started to grow." She glanced at her palm, the same that held Ruby's hand but a moment ago. "Everything was alright when I was younger." As she kept her eyes in the same spot, she noticed the small droplets of water hit her skin. Salty water. Tears.

"It felt normal, whatever normal could even mean. I had a father and a mother, sure he was… Demanding, but it felt different than now. Winter was there too and Whitley was just a baby and mother. Mother was there, she was happy. She was sober." She closed her hand at that. No, she clenched it into a fist. She felt her nails bite into the skin, the same skin that previously was soiled with her own tears. She could feel the pain. It felt good at the moment. It distracted her, but not enough. "I sometimes dream of it. Not the most pleasant dream. I never have this dream when I'm here though. Just when I'm at my house. The moment all of my life turned into what it is now. My birthday, the first one I can really remember. Maybe because my mind won't let me forget. I think I was used to whatever was going on, meaning that it was normal, like any other of my birthdays. It wasn't a party like you or Yang would make. It was just some family, a reason to sit together and eat a cake, you know?" She felt as if there was a giant hand around her neck, making it hard to move. To swallow. To breathe. She shook her head, not letting her own fears to overtake her. Not now, she went too far. She had to be strong, for Ruby's sake.

"They were arguing, I'm not sure about what. My mind was too young to comprehend it. But then it happened. He told her how he married her for the money. For prestige. For the position." It was hard to breathe. Not for the same reason as a moment ago. This time it felt like something was on top of her chest. Crushing it, making it impossible to fill her lungs with air. She was having a panic attack, wasn't she?

"Weiss? Weiss! Calm down, Weiss. I'm here, everything will be alright." Ruby's voice came to her ears yet it felt so distant. Then she felt her arms, gently wrap against her waist. It helped, it always helped to have Ruby by her side. She could feel herself relax, feel air invade her lungs in a more appropriate manner. She could feel like she was once more inside her own body. Not just a guest.

"After that." She continued, she had to. She could assure the other girl that she was alright later, for now, she had to bring her story, her thoughts, her problems to some form of a conclusion, even if a fake one, but one that she believed in. "It all turned to be as you know it to be right now. I barely see them, they communicate via messages and servants. It got worse once Winter left to the military academy." She placed her hands on the other girl's arms, the same arms that were wrapped around her waist still.

There was silence once she finished. Why wouldn't there be? Ruby was never good with that kind of things, Weiss learned about it very early on in this strange relationship they had. It's why she stopped bothering the younger girl with her troubles. Simply her presence was soothing enough. She didn't blame her of course, what anyone could tell her or do to make her feel better? To fix the issue? Not many people, that's for sure.

"I'm not the best person to ask this sort of question." Ruby started, having to clear her throat as it had to be raspy from what Weiss could tell. "I'll say it up front that… That I just read about it somewhere. I even forgot where. It must be one of those manga books that you hate so much." There was another pause, this time silent as the redhead collected her own thoughts. "I think love is like fire."

Weiss smiled at that. "Not a very pleasant thing."

"L-Listen me out! I don't mean fire like fire fire. I mean, yes but also no." The Schnee giggled at that.

"Now it sounds more like love, very convoluted and hard to understand." It was such a schadenfreude to smile at the other girl's inability to properly explain her point.

"Hey! If you're going to be mean I can just shut up." It sent a needle through her chest, hearing Ruby's voice like that. And all because she wanted to help. Weiss shook her head, reaching to rub the other girl's hand.

"No, I'm sorry. Please, continue." She encouraged the girl, who remained silent for a brief moment, only to continue.

"I think that love is like fire, or rather I believe so because it fits, you know?" While it did sound like a question, Weiss decided it was a rhetorical one and remained silent. "People often think that it's an explosion that only grows stronger, but that's not true. Sure, it can be an explosion, but like anything, it settles down. It's caused by sparks between two people and once that happens? It explodes!" Weiss was sure that if Ruby could, she would make a very broad gesture with her arms at the word explosion. She often did when she was excited about something, which did seem to be the case. Which was quite peculiar.

"But what really makes me believe that is… Well, you love someone and you want to be with them, right? Have a family and all that. It's when you take that fire you and someone else managed to achieve with your love and you make… What's that word. Hearthfire? Like a fireplace inside a house. That's what love is. Often people say that there are different types of love. But there's this fire that you share. First with someone you love, then maybe with your kids and so on. Then the kids leave and find their own fire, share it with other people." The redhead shrugged. "I sort of butchered it, but I hope you get what I meant, right? The source material explained it waaay better! I'm just bad at this." With that Ruby released a deep sigh, moving away as she sat on the bed.

Weiss remained silent, not sure what to think about Ruby's theory about love. It felt promising, like a relief for her tormented heart and mind. She wanted to believe it, that love is something good and honest, with the only example in her life being a rotten and corrupted case. But admitting to that meant that it wasn't normal. Her family wasn't like any other. It shocked her how protective she was over that thought. Over having a normal family, even if it disgusted her so many times to just think about it.

"Ruby?" She asked, not yet turning around to face the other girl.

"Yes?" It wasn't a healthy situation, for neither of them. It was strange how she could understand the other girl with a simple reply like that. Formal, uncertain, awkward. This had to stop, they had to move onto other things.

"May I hug you?" That question made the redhead pause for a moment, as she had to catch up with everything that happened so far this evening. Once she did, she beamed a smile and moved forward to do just that, hug her. And yet she stopped mid-motion.

"Ah! I understand what you meant!" She claimed triumphantly.

"You did?" Weiss tilted her head, not sure if there was anything to really understand. "Mind explaining it, then? So we're on the same page at least."

"Huh? Well, you asked if you may hug me, right?" Ruby explained, her confidence slowly deflating now.

"That's correct." The Schnee nodded.

"Right, the key word being if YOU may hug ME." The silver eyed girl nodded.

"That's not one word, Ruby." Weiss corrected the redhead.

"W-Whatever, you know what I mean!" The younger girl replied.

"Sometimes you're so weird, Ruby." She commented and started to approach the other girl. The bed Ruby owned was extra bouncy, or at least it always seemed that way to her. Walking on your knees didn't help to maintain your balance but it wasn't impossible of course. As soon as she was close enough, she leaned in to embrace the other girl.

"Coming from someone who has silly thoughts like that." The redhead waited with her reply after they hugged. Weiss was glad, as she didn't want for this to wait any longer than it already did with Ruby turning into a lawyer.

"I know." Instead of defending herself, she knew that her previous thoughts were dumb. Just because her parents had a failed relationship doesn't mean that love was a bad thing at its core. Like anything in life, it could get corrupted and twisted by evil and selfish hearts. At these thoughts, she leaned more against the girl. She felt her fight for balance, but she didn't stop.

"Whoa W-Weiss we-eep!" Ruby tried to warn Weiss, but it was too late, as they were already falling. It didn't hurt, how would it, with them being on a comfy bed. With the Schnee on top now, Ruby could feel the older girl's embrace tighten. Whatever was the reason for that, was unknown, but even she was aware that asking if Weiss was alright would be pointless. She wasn't, that was the point of this hug.

Instead, she moved one of her hands towards the other girl's white hair, caressing her with gentle motions. Her fingers would sink into its softness, which made her question if it was still Weiss's hair or something else. Silk came to mind. It was hard to deduce how much time passed like this, as Ruby couldn't twist her head enough and in a subtle manner to check the clock. Then again she didn't really care much to do so. It wasn't a bad spot to be in, perhaps the only thing she would change was the reason behind all of this. That being Weiss's bad mood. Still, she felt like she had to say something. "Feeling better?"

As if this was some secret code for the two, Weiss released her from her embrace and sat up. "Yes, I apologize Ruby." Noticing that the redhead was about to say something as she herself moved up to a sitting position, Weiss continued. "I'm not apologizing for what occurred here even if I think I should I know that you would just say how it wasn't an issue." She let out a deep sigh, closing her eyes. "Instead I just wanted to apologize that I waited with all of this till it reached its critical mass. I should trust you more, be more open with you." Opening her eyes again she saw a cheerful smile in front of her, which was hard not to answer with her own. "Perhaps it would improve my everyday mood as well if I split my issues bit by bit."

"Of course you can! No! Not just can, you should." Ruby nodded and started to turn around on her spot. "So uh, want to continue with our game? I mean we do have a level to beat."

"Yes, let's." Weiss nodded and as she saw the younger girl ready to move up to go towards her gaming desk, she grabbed her arm stopping her before she could stand up. She was meet with a pair of confused silver eyes. "But before we do, there is one more question I wanted to ask you."

"Uh huh? What's up?" Ruby tilted her head curiously.

Weiss wasn't sure where that idea came from, or if there even was an idea at that point. Perhaps she just did it out of reflex, knowing that something more had to be said or done in this situation. This was extremely confusing for her but in the end? She didn't really regret it. "May I kiss you?"

"Eh?!" Ruby's eyes went wide at the question, as she looked to the side, a deep crimson hue appearing on her cheeks. There was a moment, a very long moment, in which regret did start to surface in Weiss's mind, but before it could fully do so, the redhead rubbed her neck and once more offered her bright smile.

"You may."

**Author's note 2:**

**There were two "inspirations" for this story. The first was the setup, so the "failed game" thing. I had an uh… deleted scene I guess? Where I described them in the game world and how they failed but I decided to scrap that since it was just confusing and didn't really add much. Ironically I was inspired by EDF out of all games. The second inspiration was about the love thing. It was from a crappy flash game, a very old game that if you know what I'm referring to, kudos to you.**

**I know I should update my faunus Ruby story but I sort of hit a wall with it. I'll just brute force myself through it and hopefully be able to move that story forward.**

**Anyhow, hope you enjoyed this little oneshot!**


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